


When

by rcmsw



Series: Rebelcaptain Appreciation Week [4]
Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, F/M, Fix-It, Fluff, With a side of angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-22
Updated: 2017-04-22
Packaged: 2018-10-22 14:16:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10698747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rcmsw/pseuds/rcmsw
Summary: They promise minutes, hours, days to each other, lifetimes for them, but a soldier’s lifetime, a lifetime at war. They make no promises about a lifetime in peace. Something is different this time though, amid the celebration on Endor, below a destroyed Imperial star. It’s a turning point, not just for the war, but for them.After the Battle of Endor, Jyn and Cassian look to the future they never knew they'd have.For Rebelcaptain Appreciation Week - Day 7





	When

The forest spreads out around her, green leaves and huge tree trunks covered in moss. And in the sky, stardust.

From the ground on Endor, Jyn watches the second, and last, Death Star implode, the emperor and Vader along with it. Her father’s memory is finally secure, for good this time.

  
She feels the notion rain down on her, sinking into her bones until it is a part of her very being.

  
While the other Pathfinders whoop and cheer beside her, she closes her eyes and feels a stillness, a calm she has not known since she was a little girl.

  
It doesn’t last long. She’s soon swooped up by Kes Dameron.

  
“We did it, rebel,” he grins at her as he pulls her into the celebration.

  
She falls in with them eagerly, smiling like a child at the rebellion’s success. She hugs her comrades, and joins in on the whistles directed at Princess Leia and Han Solo. Seeing their closeness makes her yearn for her rebel, wondering where he is in this moment, hoping he’s near.

  
As dusk begins to fall on the moon, she breaks away from the Pathfinders and the bonfire they’ve rallied around, climbing up through the Ewok village to a bridge that gives her the best vantage point. She ditches her green and tan poncho, wanting to be easily spotted. Some of the high command had protested, but nonetheless members from all different divisions of the rebellion were filing into the village, having been transported down to the moon for the celebration. They were worried about a counterattack, a valid concern. The war wasn’t over yet, she knew that, but every last one of these soldiers had earned a night of celebration. One in particular, who had been fighting all his life.

  
She sees him then, as if her thoughts were strong enough to conjure him. He’s limping slightly, an old wound never fully healed, but his steps are lighter than normal, the relief of victory lifting the usual weight from his shoulders.

  
Her joy bubbles over at the sight of him, and she calls his name, loudly, unembarrassed by the way it rings through the trees causing others to turn towards her. He barely has time to look up and meet her eyes before she’s moving down towards him. They meet off to the side of the growing crowd, eyes locked as they gravitate to each other.

  
“Jyn,” he says softly, his usual greeting for her, but it still makes her breathless every time.

  
“Cassian,” she echoes, too overwhelmed to add anything more.

  
His arms slide around her waist as hers find their place around his neck. They stay like that, close enough to feel each other’s breath, to know the other one is still breathing, but far enough to see each other’s faces, to stare into each other’s eyes.

  
She recognizes the look he’s giving her, so similar to the way he stared at her on Scarif, as they rode the elevator down to the beaches below.

 

That moment in the elevator struck her harder than any blow she’d ever taken, hit her to her very core. It was everything all at once as she gazed into his eyes, her feelings for him coming to a point. Her mind realized what she already felt for him while imagining everything they could be, all while knowing they would never get the chance. It was beautiful and heart wrenching, too much and not enough all at once.

  
Jyn had never thought much about her future. Her time with Saw taught her not to count on it, her time alone reaffirmed the idea. She knew Cassian was much the same, fighting for the rebellion, not himself. Neither one of them had thought about their own futures, until they found a reason for one in the same moment they lost all chance at it.

  
But in the dark of that elevator ride, she could see it clearly. Her future, in his face, staring back at her. His eyes held all the possibilities - a life with the rebellion, a home with him.

  
They did not speak the words, give a voice to the possibilities. It would have been too bitter, with the end they expected to face. Besides, there was no need. They saw it clearly reflected in each other’s looks. The widening of her eyes, the focus of his, their haggard breaths, the closeness, it all conveyed what words could not.

  
So instead they held each other’s gaze as they held each other near.

 

Even after their survival, after they had made it home and found their way back into each other’s arms, they still didn’t talk about the future.  
He holds her gaze before he departs for missions, head ducked but eyes lifted to her.

  
“I’ll find you when I get back,” he tells her, leaning in close. She knows the word itself is new for him, dangerous even. When, not if.

  
She makes light of his concern as she leaves on her own missions, eyes sparkling as her shoulders shrug at the potential danger. She gets serious in time for her final departure, gaze hard and determined to ensure he feels the weight of the simple words.

  
“I’ll come home as soon as I can,” she tells him.

  
They promise minutes, hours, days to each other, lifetimes for them, but a soldier’s lifetime, a lifetime at war. They make no promises about a lifetime in peace.

She catches herself thinking about it sometimes though - a life after war. Nothing grand, just small snippets. She’s sitting in the mess hall with Cassian, eating the nutrient mush and drinking cold caf. But Cassian has a smile on his face, and it draws one from her as well. It’s such a perfect little moment, she can’t help but imagine it in a different setting. In their own home, she’s not sure where, drinking blue milk and eating something delicious that Cassian has made for them.

She wakes from a nightmare - flashes of her mother, father and Saw mixed with Krennic and the Death Star. She turns and Cassian is there, lying beside her, his body warm amid the cold air of Hoth. She presses closer to him, her nose to his collarbone. The arm he has draped around her waist tightens, pulls her in as he tucks her head under his chin. His thumb strokes lazy patterns into her hip as she falls back asleep. In her tired state, she imagines waking up next to him everyday, somewhere warm instead, without the sounds of pounding combat boots outside the door.

She always stops herself before these dreams go too far. And she never voices them. She wonders if he has the same dreams, but like her, he nevers speaks them.

  
It feels like it would just be tempting fate. Making a plan for their lives together is like asking the galaxy to pull them apart, and it has more than enough opportunities as it is.

  
So instead they take each moment they get, grateful for it, secretly greedy for another.

 

  
Something is different this time though, amid the celebration on Endor, below a destroyed Imperial star. It’s a turning point, not just for the war, but for them. It’s not over, not yet, but for the first time they both believe that it could be. For the first time they both allow themselves to think that they could make it, they could survive to see the end of the war, to see peace.

  
She sees it in his eyes, knows it must be reflected in her own. All the possibilities that stretch before them, and hope alongside it. This time there is no bitterness to the look, no regret of lost time. This time, they actually have a chance to grab those possibilities, to make them real.

  
“We could make it, you know,” she tells him, voice light, testing the words.

  
“The war’s not over yet,” he says, hesitant but the words are an echo of old habits, not the truth of how he feels now.

  
“I know,” she sighs. “But we could.” Her tone lifts, laced with hope.

  
“Together,” he adds, voice fuller now, his words finally matching his thoughts.

  
Jyn smiles at him then, a soft laugh escaping her lips. He grins back at her, the joy reaching his eyes and making him look younger, and he lets out a laugh of his own, unrestrained and easy.

  
She gets drunk on the sound, lets it embolden her.

  
“What will we do when we make it?” she asks. That word again, when, but she pushes away any uncertainty, says it surely, if only for today. They can go back to being careful tomorrow, but with the ashes of the Death Star raining down on them and her arms around him, she’s willing to be reckless in a way she never has been. As always, she trusts he’ll catch her.

  
Cassian hesitates a little, his restraint hard to break, even for her, but another soft smile from her does him in, convinces him to play along. He grabs her hand to pull her towards him and they start walking. His arm settles around her shoulders, while she wraps both of hers around his middle. They’re pressed along the length of each other’s side, hip to hip, heads leaning close, noses and mouths practically touching.

  
“Well,” he starts, keeping his voice light. “We’ll find a nice, temperate planet. Someplace warm, basically anywhere but Hoth.”

  
“Hoth had its moments,” she smirks at him, and he winks back, as they both remember the different ways they found to keep warm.

  
“All the same, querida, I’d like to settle somewhere where you can step outside without worrying about losing fingers” he says.

  
“Fine, fine, Hoth is out,” she teases.

  
“Wherever it is, the alliance military will set me up with a nice promotion, I’ll work from base. I may even see all that back pay they owe me, and I’ll always come home on time,” he laughs at that, neither one of them believes those last two.

  
“And what, I’ll have dinner waiting for you on the table?” Jyn glares at him.

  
“Force, no,” he mutters. “I’ll cook. You’ll stay the hell away from the kitchen.”

  
“I only started one fire Cassian, you need to let that go,” she rolls her eyes at him. “What will I do all day?”

  
“What do you want to do?” he asks her, genuinely curious.

  
“I don’t know,” she realizes. “It’s hard to imagine anything but fighting, but I’m not sure if I’d do well in an army at peace time. I think they might actually expect me to follow orders then.”

  
“I think they expect that now,” he snorts, but gets serious when he sees her face. The idea of an open future sounded nice, idealistic, but now she’s realizing how little she’s prepared to face it.

  
“You’ll have time to figure it out,” he reassures her, hand rubbing her shoulder. “We’ll make it work, together.”

  
They stop now, in front of the hut that’s been assigned to her. She turns to him, all too willing to let the joy take over again. She recognizes how rare a moment like this is, refuses to waste it. Her eyes narrow as she looks up at him, brows quirked.

  
“You’ve given this a lot of thought,” she says, both surprised and pleased.

  
“I’ve imagined it many times, dreamt of it,” he tells her. His brow wrinkles, and she sees the hint of that old look come back into his eyes, the doubt threatening to chase out their earlier happiness. “I never thought I’d get to see it. I’m still not sure if I will.”

  
“We have a chance,” she tells him, eyes wide as a smile tugs at her lips. “And I think we should take it.”

  
“I’m with you,” he tells her. He’s serious for just one more moment before his look changes, a devious grin flashing across his face as he presses closer to her.

  
“Until then, I have more immediate plans in mind.” He ducks his head until his lips find hers, deepening the kiss immediately and gently pushing her back into the hut. Her fingers rake through his hair, and her mind gives up on plans for the future to focus on the perfection of the present moment.

 

 

One year and four days later, she finds herself in his arms again. They’re surrounded by sand this time, warm sun beating down on them after the Battle of Jakku. They’re both worse for wear, bruises and blaster wounds singeing their skin in the few places the sun has not burned them. But they’re alive and together. He looks at her with those same eyes, as he did on Scarif and Endor, but this time they’re full of promise instead of possibility. This time the war is truly, finally, over. She kisses him then, lips soft and slow. They take their time, because for the first time they actually have it, all the time in the galaxy. They’re breathless when they finally pull apart, but she manages a few words.

  
“What will we do, now that we’ve made it,” she asks him. No need for whens or if now. Their lives, their future are their own, a certainty.

  
“Let’s start by going home,” he says.

  
It’s an adjustment, learning to plan for a lifetime, but they adapt quickly.

**Author's Note:**

> I forced myself to write more than three sentences of dialogue with this one, and it actually worked. Thank you reading! Responses are always appreciated!  
> And I'm on tumblr as [rebsrising](https://rebsrising.tumblr.com/)


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